Shadowcat Movie / TV Reviews - The Majorettes aka One By One (1986)

The Majorettes aka One By One (1986)

Reviewer - Rox Pebble

This is an utterly ludicrous slasher film that was apparently made on a budget of pocket change.

The school majorettes who wear shiny blue swimsuits with sequins on it do bad dance routines - they are so out of step, you feel embarrassed for them - and twirl batons - equally badly. Anyway one of them Nicole goes on a date with a nerd and attempts to get it on with him in his car only to chicken out and reveal she dated a sleazy local drug dealer and is pregnant with his child and only went out with the nerd to screw him so she could claim he was the baby's daddy.

The nerd takes this rather well and sympathises with her plight but promptly a man in camouflage rips the roof off the car, hacks the nerd up and does the same to Nicole. The local sheriff investigates. Meanwhile the perverted school janitor is taking photos of the girls in the locker room through a peephole. The perv is the son of a nurse who tends to the rich grandmother of a richgirl majorette (this is an important plot point).

Meanwhile camouflage guy does in another majorette in her swimming pool. For some reason the football star hero and his majorette girlfriend have 'issues' so after a quarrel she goes into the locker-room to change and camouflage guy attacks her and the pervert janitor photographs the whole murder including the part where the killer's mask gets ripped off revealing that the killer is the sheriff! Wow, what a twist - didn't see that one coming did you.

Anyway football hero and richgirl majorette get worried over the non-return of football hero's girlfriend so they go into the locker-room to find her. Richgirl carefully runs her hand over the blood covered lockers so she can get blood on her hand and act 'shocked' and rip open a locker causing dead naked majorette to fall out as richgirl screams "Oi ma Gowad!" The dead majorette manages to keep her arms wrapped around her naked chest for this whole scene of painfully bad acting.

Anyway nurse and her perv son concoct a plan. They trap the sheriff in their basement and blackmail him into murdering richgirl. The nurse wants him to kill richgirl majorette after she turns 18, so the grandmother will inherit her $500, 000 trust fund. Evil nurse then plans on giving grandmother a lethal injection of insulin so evil nurse will inherit it. The sheriff agrees and reveals he's hacking up the majorettes because they are sluts who display their bodies and need to be purified.

However the plans of evil nurse and demented religious wacko Sheriff get thrown out of wack when football hero and richgirl are abducted by the crazy local drug dealer. The one who got Nicole pregnant. Seems football hero witnessed him yelling at Nicole and told the cops and now drug dealer and his gang want BLOOD. Perv janitor witnesses the abduction and runs after the crazed gang as he sees their trust fund theft plan going up in smoke - richgirl's 18th birthday isn't for another 2 weeks and if she dies before 18, her money reverts to the state. What a twist!

Drug dealer ends up shooting the janitor and richgirl dead. Football hero cradles richgirl's corpse and attempts to emote rage but is distracted by richgirl moving around despite the fact she is supposed to be dead. Now football hero thinks drug dealer is the one who killed his dead girlfriend, you know the one he forgot about to sniff after richgirl and he just saw drug dealer kill richgirl. So he gets angry. Anyway he strips off his shirt, grabs a gun and heads off to drug dealer's HQ and systematically slaughters every single one of the gang and it's a big gang. Afterward he collapses against a tree and attempts to emote mental breakdown. What a twist.

Are you following me so far?

Anyway the Sheriff visits evil nurse, kills her, steals the blackmail photos and plants his murder gear and weapon in her dead son's room. So the perv janitor takes the rap as the killer meanwhile football hero is locked up in jail but the Sheriff says approvingly that football hero did the state a favour and that will help at his trial. Football hero killed more people in a five minute scene then the villain of the film did in the entire film, there is a message in that. Then again wiping out about 30 people should make him an ideal NFL candidate. The creepy sheriff then watches a group of pre-teen girls practising a majorette routine. Roll credits.

BAD acting and zero production values (the lighting turns people's hair green) drag this film down. The final scene is disturbing but this is the only effective part in the whole 96-minute film. Rent it for Halloween for a 'bad horror movie night' but other than that don't bother. This film is so badly made, acted, written and edited and oozes such bad taste and sleaze that it makes 'Freeway 2: Confessions of a Trickbaby' look like high art.

P-Con VI March 27th/28th/29th 2009

Toast To Life - 2009

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