Supernatural (2005 - ?) - Season 3

"Truth is I'm tired Sam and I don't know, it's like there's a light at the end of the tunnel."
"It's hellfire Dean."

The brothers realise they have the enormous task of hunting down the demons that escaped from the devil's gate (in 'All Hell Breaks Loose 2') and other hunters blame them for the demon war. Also Dean has accepted his fate and Sam has acquired a stalker.

Okay.

Highlights:

• Cool new title sequence.
• Dean drowning the lust demon in the bath filled with water and rosary beads, very cool visual.

Comments:

• Dean has a threesome while Sam sits in the car, ha ha ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaa!
• How do they keep running across other hunters?
• To get information Bobby wears a suit and looks unrecognisable.
• Demons have bars now?
• Some bad acting.
• How is Sam's stalker able to kill three demons in seconds?
• There is no way out of Dean's deal.

"Creepy stare at you like you're lunch kids."

"We'll just burst in, drag the kids out, torch them on the front lawn.
That'll play great with the neighbours."

"You're a demon!"
"Don't be such a racist."

Dean learns he may have a son and Sam learns something about his stalker. As well as all that, the brothers learn kids are being replaced by changelings in a gated community.

Uuuuuuhhhh.

Comments:

• The housewives leering at Dean, hee hee hee.
• Sam's demon stalker reveals something disturbing about Mary.
• It's always All About Sam isn't it?

"Being a hunter is so much more noble? Bunch of obsessed revenge driven sociopaths."

"I think you're a truly awful person."

The Winchester's have three problems to deal with. Gordon the crazy hunter may be in jail but he's stirring up other hunters against Sam. Also a cursed rabbit's foot is stolen, whoever possesses it has amazing luck but once it is lost, the luck turns fatal. So while Sam is held hostage by other hunters, Dean has to steal back the rabbit foot and a new foe arrives on the scene: Bela. Also Gordon plots a jailbreak. A very good comedic episode.

Highlights:

• Dean getting smacked in the face with a gun.
• The 'Final Destination' way the idiot gets a BBQ fork though the head.
• Dean throwing the tv remote control at the hunter, knocking him out and going: "I'm Batman!"

Comments:

• When did Sam learn that his demonic stalker's name is Ruby?
• So John had a storage locker full of weapons and curse boxes and never bothered to tell his son's about it?
• So Sam's psychic powers are gone? The whole Psychic Kids plot is dropped then?

It's The Rock's version of 'Walking Tall' but with demons. Sam and Dean stumble into a town over-run by sin and meet the two demons to blame. Not much else happens really. Dull.

Comments:

• I bet the mirrored ceiling in Sam and Dean's motel room inspired some fiction.
• Ruby returns to annoy some more.
• Why do the writers make Dean dumb when it suits plot purposes?
• The pig slippers were funny.
• Why did Bobby trust Ruby? Why is Sam trusting Ruby?

Sam and Dean arrive in a town where people are being killed in situations from Grimm's Fairy Tales. The brothers soon locate the source of the trouble: a real Snow White who has been left comatose since her stepmother poisoned her with bleach. After the brothers save the day, Sam makes a side trip and summons the Crossroads Demon. When she reveals that Dean's deal is unbreakable, Sam shoots her in the head killing her. Very good.

Highlights:

• The '3 Little Pigs' death scene, hee.
• Sam pretending to be a sketch artist and doing a really crappy sketch.
• The 'Hansel and Gretel' death scene, creepy.

Comments:

• The brothers use the alias' Page and Plant.
• What was the deal with the frog?
• Dean fighting the wolf in the 'Little Red Riding Hood' scene - ouch.
• Sam has no tact at all.

"How do you sleep at night?"
"On silk sheets, rolling naked in money."

"When this is over we should really have angry sex."

Sam and Dean learn drowning victims saw a ghost ship shortly before they died. As they try to get to the bottom of this death omen, Bela shows up to annoy. All this leads to a good tale of ghosts and a Hand Of Glory.

Highlights:

• The ghost ship.
• The old lady hitting on Sam.
• Dean in a tuxedo as James Bond music plays.

"Are you off your meds?"

"Can you think of a worse hell?"
"Well, there's hell."

Guest Starring: Mercedes McNab ('Angel', ''Buffy The Vampire Slayer'). Gordon escapes from jail and Bela sells out the Winchester's location to him. Then by a bizarre set of circumstances Gordon is made into a vampire. Gordon was already mad and being made into a monster makes him even more insane so he decides to use his vampire powers to kill the brothers. Cue a brutal fight in a creepy dark warehouse during which Gordon makes the mistake of drinking Dean's blood so an enraged Sam strangles Gordon with barbed wire until his head pops off. An okay episode.

"Neon sign on your front door saying come kill us."

A hilarious and excellent Sam and Dean version of Christmas as the brothers face down Pagan gods of the Winter Solstice. It's all brilliant from a diabetic shock inducing saccharine start that turns into a trauma inducing moment for a moppet. Multiple cases of people being dragged up their chimney and murdered turns out to be all down to Christmas wreaths which are actually made with meadowsweet that summon the aforementioned flesh eating Pagan gods.

Hilarious, oddly sweet and excellent.

Highlights:

• The changed title sequence.
• The creepily tawdry Santa's village with the menacing reindeer.
• The mention of John the bastard stealing an empty beer can wreath from a liquor store for his kids. Typical John.
• The obviously evil couple who are the Pagan gods.
• Sam and Dean being menaced by the Pagan gods.
• Sam and Dean killing the Pagan gods with Christmas tree branches.
• The origin of Dean's amulet.
• The sappy ending.

Comments:

• Sam and Dean pose as FBI agents despite being America's Most Wanted.
• Dean doesn't know 'Mary Poppins'.
• So in 1991, John the bastard abandoned his kids alone in a motel for Christmas.
• How did Lil'Sam not know what his dad did?
• What happened to Sam's psychic kid powers?
• Bad child actors.
• Sam seemed very happy to get those skin mags.

"Remember all those dark demonic forces you prayed to when your swore your servitude? Just who did you think you were praying to?"

Sam and Dean encounter a coven of old world black magic witches who are hiding behind the facade of being average desperate housewives. Ruby shows up to help and it is revealed that Ruby was a black magic witch centuries ago before going to hell and becoming a demon. After some witch on witch violence and an encounter with the demon behind it all, Dean comes to the terrible realisation that once in hell he too will become a demon. Good.

Highlights:

• The teeth vomiting scene - gross!
• The guy nearly choked to death with maggots - gross!

Comments:

• Sam leaves Dean, who has been hexed, coughing up blood on a motel floor so he can go all Sam Man Mountain Of Rage on the witches.
• There's a new demon threat out there after Sam.

"My father was an obsessed bastard!!!"

Bobby ends up comatose thanks to a snot nosed teenager who has dream stalking powers. Dean and Sam drink dreamroot and end up in Bobby's dream to help him. While they're distracted Bela steals the colt. Meanwhile back in dreamland: it is revealed Bobby killed his possessed wife, Sam deals with the Freddy Kruger wannabe and Dean deals with his severe daddy issues. Awful, awful, awful episode. Seriously this has to be the worst and most boring Supernatural episode ever. Bela is shoehorned in and Dean finally admitting that his father was an abusive, neglectful loser just isn't as powerful as it should have been.

"Sam Winchester wears make-up! Sam Winchester cries his way through sex! Sam Winchester keeps a ruler by the bed!"

Dean is killed. Sam goes nuts and turns into his father being an obsessive, emotionally dead Rambo type who cleans his guns while staring blankly at his wall of crazy newspaper clippings. The Trickster (from last season's awful 'Tall Tales') shows up and it was a set up all along. The Trickster was just screwing with Sam. The brothers are back together and Dean has no memory of any of it. But Sam does. Okay. This entire episode smacks of ominous foreshadowing for a future plot arc.

"Think Hannibal Lector and his half-wit little brother."

"They're Satan worshipping nutbag killers!"

"Your daddy brainwashed you with all that devil talk and no doubt touched you in a bad place."

A follow up to 'Nightshift' and 'Folsom Prison Blues'. Bela sics the FBI on the brothers. So the brothers are arrested again and are facing a life in solitary in a supermax prison. But that's the least of their problems as demons besiege the police station where they are being held. Now the FBI agent who pursued them so relentlessly now believes in the supernatural and everyone has to work together to escape. Except the new demon threat, Lilith, rises and there is a downer ending. Goodish.

Highlights:

• The brothers shackled together.
• Agent Henrickson gets all the best lines, especially the one where the show goes to the 'Papa Winchester was a bad touch daddy' place. I never thought they'd actually go there on the show, it's usually the realm of the fanficcer.

Comments:

• The show cannot keep Bela around. She stole the colt and set the brothers up to be killed by Gordon (in 'Fresh Blood') and now Henrickson.
• Dean gets shot but just walks it off.
• So the show has dropped, excuse me, wrapped up the FBI plot along with the psychic kids plot and the Sam's powers plot.
• The holy water toilet trick was inspired.
• When did Sam and Dean get anti-possession tattoos?
• Why do the brothers put up with Ruby and her rants?
• Sam was willing to commit human sacrifice, he's going dark side alright.